i don't know where to start.
all my feelings are mixed up.
love, hatred, happiness, sadness, and anger.
you always have no patience with us.
then you wanna get pissed off.
and you start scolding everyone although they have done nothing wrong.
it's you that is wrong!
why can't you realise that?
slap yourself man!
cause you're causing too many things to happen when they weren't suppose to be happening.
then you spoil every one's mood just because of what you did.
how nice is that?
it's not that we don't care about you.
we do, but you don't realise it.
you'll NEVER realise it.
i feel sad for her because she has been going through all these for so many years now.
i finally understand why you are acting this way.
i finally understood.
i hate you for not knowing that she was always there for you, always caring for what you need.
but you never ever did the same things for her.
YOU NEVER DID.
it's hard living with you, you know.
you always give us a hard time.
and that stresses me out!
i am sick of it!
when she told me the news, i was happy and also sad at the same time.
i knew how she felt years ago.
because of her compassion for you, knowing you will do something stupid, she chose to stay for the sake of her kids.
we weren't happy.
to see this happening.
we stopped them.
we did.
then slowly, as time goes by, you are just getting worst!
how can you be a proper example to us when you dun show any good things about yourself?
all we see is the bad side of yours.
and you always teach us about grace, but you have never shown grace to us.
which makes it so hard to accept.
sometimes i wish i could just kill you.
but it can't happen.
looking forward to this.
of course i am happy.
going to be another fun day after talking to them again.
kinda miss talking to them.
those times where we will laugh and laugh and have fun together.
so we went out for a walk.
i followed.
something told me it wasn't a good idea, but what else can i do?
stay there and rot??
so the journey started....
it was scary for me as the place was dark.
only a few street lights were on and the place was just creepy.
then here it goes.
so i was walking in front with Amelia and this guy, robin, was annoying me by steeping on my slippers.
man, do you have nothing else to do?
i got pissed off and told him off and so did the rest.
then he stopped.
on our journey back, he started again!
man, i was on fire!
he continued and no matter how many times i told him to stop, he didn't.
i felt like just taking him and throwing him into the drain nearby.
then, *plak* , my slippers were spoiled by him.
well thank you so much you bastard!
before this, my dad kept on calling me to come back to the house, but we were a long long way from home.
so robin already pissed me off, then my dad came and add oil into the damn fire!
i could have been a volcano which could erupt anytime!
so after he spoiled my slippers, i had to run bear foot back home.
my feet hurt so badly!
then i saw that look on my dad's face, all red and fierce.
i knew it wasn't a good sign and he's gonna start blabbing non-stop.
so we went home, on the way, he was mumbling by himself as i didn't bother about what he was talking about.
blah blah blah.
i was so heart broken cause i loved that slippers!
plus it was damn new.
shit you lah bastard.
the next day, my mum talked to his mum about it and his mum dragged the rest of them into this matter.
i was so annoyed!
they didn't even do anything wrong and you're blaming them for no reason?
wow.
so she asked him to apologise to me and also pay for the new pair that my mum is gonna get me.
he didn't even meant his apology.
he just did it so he could satisfy both parties.
i faked a smile and kept my mouth tightly shut.
i couldn't even smile actually, wanted to box him so badly.
i had to sing on that day so i decided to calm down so it wouldn't spoil my mood.
then after our mums have left he was talking about the slippers over and over again.
CAN'T YOU KEEP YOU'RE MOUTH SHUT ?
i didn't bother and just walked away.
i don't plan on talking to him again.
after this matter i am really starting to hate rich people.
some are really humble and kind, but this is just too over!
you are protecting your son for what he did wrong?!
can't you just tell him straight in the face that he had done something wrong?
if i were you i would have scolded him terribly till he wet his pants or something!
so yeah.
that's about it.
the names above are changed for some reasons.
all i do is just sitting down and wondering if i could just turn back time.
i wish i could undo what i have did that caused us to be this way.
i don't know what is gonna happen after the holidays.
hopefully we can talk to each other again?
i still miss those memories that we had for the past year.
those tears and the laughter that we had, will be always remembered.
always.
time to get excited!
but sadly there was nothing to be excited about since i had a terrible stomach ache before the camp.
that was just horrible!
there was nothing i can do but to go on and attend the camp.
so i reached school, half dead.
could not even walk properly.
anyways, let's get started.
so we waited half an hour for the students to arrive.
many were late!
kinda disappointed about that.
then we started with the official assembly and then started off with an ice breaking game.
then each group presented their yell.
after that, they all went to change as we all were going to play station games!
i was excited though i wasn't playing.
i briefed them on the rules and so, the game begun.
i was rounding the school checking on every group and also the stations.
not long after, the groups have finished playing and it was time for torture!
i asked all the students to gather at the back field.
they don't really have the idea of what we were going to do.
all they see was buckets of water every where.
then the board members and some seniors started to wet all the student!
that was fun!
even i got wet!
the water ruined all my name tags.
then we had cooking competition!
we were all starving!
then each group prepared a meal for the board members which was also the judges.
wow.
the food was awesome!
didn't know they were such good cooks!
i enjoyed all the food they had prepared.
it was awesome!
we had a break and continued with the indoor games.
we had lots of fun but sadly we had to call it a day.
it was a very good experience for me to get to know my society members even better.
it was a very very tiring day and i enjoyed it.
thank you for always being there for me when i needed you.
thank you for always putting a smile on my face.
and you sound so cute on the phone!
hehe.
i love you. ♥
one day i caught myself smiling for no reason, then i realized i was thinking of you.
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