i have had enough.

i have had enough.
i cannot take this anymore.
i don't understand why both of you want to make my life this miserable.
it is even worst when i am the only one who knows what is happening.
no one else does.
don't you know it is so hard for me to go through this ?
you all somehow just don't bother do you ?
you all should have get it over and done with years ago but you have to drag it till now.
NOW.
why?
isn't life already hard enough ?
why do you have to make it harder?
all these things are piling up one by one after each day.
all you wanna do is do things by yourself and bla bla bla.
you have got us committed to this church and now you want us to leave ?
no. enough is enough.
i am leaving.

have you ever seen a bird fly ?

have you ever seen a bird fly ?
it looks so easy for them.
just flap their wings and there they go.
they can go where ever they want, do whatever they want.
so much of freedom.
sometimes i envy them.
knowing that they have so much of freedom.
they are so free.
why can't we be like that ?
as free as them ?
instead, we have to study like mad people trying to understand things we don't want to understand.
we have to work to earn money.
we have to go through all the obstacles in life.
obstacles we did not choose.
so many things to take into consideration in so many things.
why can't we have the freedom which birds have ?

i am very annoyed.
annoyed with every single thing.
i have a never ending headache and i don't seem to know what is the cause.
it won't stop!
i can't read any of my novels because it would just make it worst.
then there is graduation.
oh my goodness.
i cannot take this anymore!
i am always stuck in the middle.
no choice but to follow orders and instructions given.
i am so fed up.
partly the reason why i don't want to go for it.
i don't find it to have any benefit.
i see more of the disadvantages compared to the advantages.
i think i have made the right choice. :)

in life, you will meet a lot of people on the way.
along the way, some of those people can really get on your nerves.
really.
seriously.
it's completely ridiculous!
yes, you want it, basically, you want everything to be right for yourself.
everything is just yourself, yourself and yourself.
different people have different ways of seeing things.
so what makes you think that being right all the time is correct?
have you ever thought about other people?
obviously, you don't, do you ?
you have to, i repeat, YOU HAVE TO win every single argument.
what's the point?
do you get a trophy?
do you get money ?
NO !
you do not.
sadly.
so then why act like that ?
why make everyone hate you ?
i cannot take this anymore.
facing this every single day.
i am so fed up and that's why i just don't want to talk to you.
don't you realise you are such a pain in the butt ?
well, i guess you don't.
that's why you are like that.
that's why you want everything to be done in your way.
good luck in handling life, you self-centred person.

i cannot act as if nothing has happened.
i could not believe it myself.
i guess i have expected too much in return.
but i had never thought of it as something that was very hard to do.
i wonder whether you really value this.
i wonder whether you really bother about it.
if you don't, all these years would have been put to waste.
i really can't believe what you have done.
i am so disappointed in you.
very, very disappointed.

been getting back marks for trials.
some are better than i have expected, some are well, just down the drains.
the consequences when i don't study.
so now, all i can do is blame myself.
i only have a month left till the real exam.
until now, i don't see the point of sitting for this exam.
yes, it can help me to get into colleges and bla bla bla.
sadly, i don't want to sit for this exam.
it freaks me out.
time is running out.
and i am still stuck in my world, my time.

girls.
guys.
a relationship.
i believe that being a girl, you must have pride.
you must not let a guy have it all.
i have learnt from past mistakes.
knowing that i cannot force what cannot be forced.
love.
love cannot be forced.
it is something you are willing to do.
like willing to love someone with all your heart.
so what if you know that either one of you have lost interest?
i believe that that person should make a move and just end the relationship.
what for you let something go on and on when there is no love in it ?
sometimes, people like you should learn to let go and just live your life.
don't you know how worried your parents are?
guess you don't.
i may not be very close with you, but i can tell you that you have mixed with the wrong company.
it's not too late to come out of it.
hey , let it go.
be someone new :)

i am currently reading the second book of The Hunger Games, Catching Fire.
it is so nice!
i can't wait till this headache goes away so that i can finish it and start on the third!
can't wait can't wait !\

some things may come and go. 

but in all circumstances, please, don't give up :)

that's all for now. 

so far everyday is really not my day. 

anyway, thanks for dropping by and God bless all of you ! 

lots of love, 

miss awesome. 

i am back.

i am back.
it feels good !
well, everything feels good.

trials are over now.
what a tremendous relieve !
after it finished, i have been eating lots of chocolates, ice cream and all the junk in the world!
my freedom has finally returned.
owing to the fact that i have my freedom back, i have read two novels in two days.
and it feels great !
i have my new favourite book now, Song of  the Sparrow.

my new favourite :)

and just by looking at the cover, it took my breath away. 

the storyline was awesome and i loved how it has been written. 

one word, WOW. 

i suggest you to buy this book ! 

haha. 

next, The Hunger Games. 

surprisingly, the pump it up is back in town ! 

it has been fully upgraded i guess. 

i am so addicted to it though i don't play like a professional. 

those guys, freak me out. 

they are so good in it! 

i wonder when i could play like that. 

currently trying to master a song called Deja Vu. 

time to step it up ! 

i am currently filled with boredom. 

i can't find a single thing to do except to read my novels. 

i guess i have to find something else to do ! 

thanks for dropping by and God bless all of you. 

will update more soon, i hope. 

stay healthy ! :D 

loves, 

missawesome.